Last week was so intense and this week is a very slow week. This week, I do find it difficult to imagine myself out of work. When I imagine myself having my dream lifestyle, I imagine myself as being another person entirely! I do miss human contact when I'm at home.
The motivation is very low this week. I procrastinated so much on my crow painting that I planned to do for AIMAE (a show which is "gift" themed). A few suggested reasons:
- it's too typically "me", and maybe I am getting bored of me
- because of the clientele, there is extra pressure to create something that is traditionally "good" art or maybe it will flow into the Edgy, Youthful, Trendy scene, neither of which I fit comfortably into. Plus, there are so many fees, that I would have to spend an extra long time on this piece so that after the deductions, it would even be worth it.
But that's done. And I have a personal painting started for the cat cubesat series (for which I really need a better name!). There are so many possibilities for the cubesat, that despite my lack of motivation, I am definitely still swimming with ideas.
Is this how my "low tide" of art motivation going to be from now on? Because I'm feeling pretty lucky in that regard. I remember blogging like this just a few years ago when an art crash would have me sitting around making no art for WEEKS! For months, maybe.
Having hard personal deadlines, and working in different "series" and themes (whether it's specific projects, or styles, or media or even different types of hobbies)... it's quite transformative and you should try it.
The major downside to giving someone else complete control over your schedule in exchange for minimum wage, is that sometimes bad decisions happen behind closed doors, and no one thinks to ask if you are okay with working a 6-day weekend.
So I've been just GONE for a week, sleep deprived and can't remember what I was doing before all of that. Also, just under a week is an awful lot of time for me, as I have 3 video deadlines every week, a calendar of submission deadlines to keep track of, and nevermind personal stuff!
Well I survived and I'm back! My original plan was just to worry about video editing and patreon sketches on worknights, but wow, that's just not productive enough for six days. Usually it's about three, so slowing down is okay. I didn't get as much sketching done though, as the sleepiness compounds every day. My bad!
Today is a day off, finally! And it is refreshing to be Down to Work. No time to procrastinate today, I was at the desk by 9am! It's halfway through the month and I need a real-time patreon video to go up! I don't have a video finished for youtube tomorrow, either! I need some artwork to send to a couple of upcoming juried shows. I just got a commission request last night that is going to have to be Suddenly Prioritized. It's a busy day, but I'm LOVING it. Now if only I could do it full time... hmmm....
Also, I might not be unemployed this spring after all. It's a stretch, and not a very wise one, but it would be nice to take one thing off my plate at the moment.
The weather has been suddenly warm this weekend and I haven't gotten around to cleaning up the balcony yet - aaah! What an inconvenient time to have such an unpredictable work schedule. I haven't even started to file taxes yet!
Hello! I'm Melissa, and here you'll find some behind-the-scenes footage of an artful life. Won't you join me?